Clearly the solution is to have the three year old put the two year old down for a nap every day!
Joseph, Gabriella, Julianna, James, and Elora
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
{naptime} #2
On the other hand, you have days like today where the tired two year old climbs into bed, and then big sister comes along and shuts the curtains, tucks her little sister in, and then crawls into bed and falls asleep right along beside her.
Clearly the solution is to have the three year old put the two year old down for a nap every day!
Clearly the solution is to have the three year old put the two year old down for a nap every day!
Tuesday, July 9, 2013
{naptime}
Putting a cranky two year old down for a nap is like....well, it's like putting a two year old down for a nap.
If you've done it, you know exactly what I'm talking about.
If you never have, there are no words that can properly explain it!
Suffice it to say that by the time the toddler's finally asleep, it's the mama who REALLY needs a nap!
If you've done it, you know exactly what I'm talking about.
If you never have, there are no words that can properly explain it!
Suffice it to say that by the time the toddler's finally asleep, it's the mama who REALLY needs a nap!
They look so angelic when asleep...it's all a lie.
Tuesday, June 18, 2013
Sisters
So a few months ago, my sister Daniella posted this picture on her blog, and I just fell in love with it.
It was so pretty and romantic and appropriate to us Neal sisters! Ever since I saw it, I've been wanting to get us all together and take a picture just like it, especially because we all have long hair at the moment.
A few weekends ago, Daniella and Phillip were in town for Lydia's graduation, and the next day was Daniella's birthday. We were all up at my parents' house and decided to seize the opportunity to take our own picture. Here is our version:
You may have noticed there are five of us in the picture. My lovely cousin Tiana, who grew up with us and is practically our sister, was in town too, so we talked her into joining us! (It wasn't that hard. ;-) We all love playing dress up.) Sadly, the one who's missing is my dear sister in law Melissa, who had a family emergency and couldn't come. I hope soon we can do another fun "sister shoot" when she can join us!
Thursday, April 25, 2013
Roasted Chicken and Vegetable Soup
Courtesy of the worst allergy attack I think Albuquerque has ever experienced, my diet the past week has consisted mainly of soup and frozen yoghurt, the only things that feel good on my very sore throat. I'll eat canned soup if I'm desperate or too sick to cook, but I much prefer good homemade soup. It tastes better, is better for me, and I can control the ingredients that go into it and guarantee it stays gluten free for the little ones.
Over the weekend I made a giant pot of chicken soup, and the minute we finished it, I started some more! For a long time I couldn't really figure out how to make good soup without buying canned chicken broth. I tried boiling chicken breasts, but all I got was some lame thin chicken-flavored water, not that delicious rich fatty broth that is so necessary to good soup. Then I learned that I needed to boil chicken bones to make good broth, so I attempted that and it was better, but something still wasn't right. Finally I hit upon the happy combination of roasting my chicken in the oven and then boiling it, bones and all, to make a delicious broth that tasted just right.
This roasted chicken recipe is one of my favorite easy yet delicious dinners to make, and I discovered that if I make a little extra, I can use the leftovers to make chicken soup for another day. It's very easy if you count the amount of work you actually have to do - it just takes a little time for all the roasting and boiling and cooking.
Step 1 - Roast the chicken
You can use a whole chicken, but I prefer to buy chicken thighs and drumsticks, bone in (this is the essential point!), usually 2 pieces per person. Arrange the pieces in a large glass baking dish and sprinkle liberally with salt and pepper. I like to season mine with an herb blend called "Herbs de Provence." I already happened to have a jar of this blend, which I'm sure you can buy in stores, but here is a recipe for mixing your own. Mine does NOT include fennel, however, as I don't like the texture of the fennel seeds. But you can use other seasonings if you prefer. Next, take a stick of butter and cut into pieces, then place butter pieces on top of the chicken pieces. I usually use a whole stick for a large pan of chicken, but reduce if you have fewer chicken pieces (approx. 1 Tablespoon per piece of chicken).
Roast chicken, uncovered, in 375 degree oven for about 1 1/2 hours, until the chicken is nicely browned and the skin is crispy. You might want to check it at an hour and rotate the pan, since everyone's oven cooks a little differently. Slide a knife in next to the bone and see if meat pulls away easily to determine if it's sufficiently cooked. The meat under the skin should be very tender.
Served your family this delicious chicken, with sweet potatoes and a salad, or mixed vegetables and rice, or whatever sides you prefer - but don't forget to save a few extra pieces of chicken AND the drippings from the pan for your soup! You can even save the empty bones for boiling.
*If you're pressed for time, a good shortcut is to buy a whole rotisserie chicken from the store, eat that for dinner, and then save the carcass with a little meat still on it. You can boil the entire carcass to make soup.
*If you're pressed for time, a good shortcut is to buy a whole rotisserie chicken from the store, eat that for dinner, and then save the carcass with a little meat still on it. You can boil the entire carcass to make soup.
Step 2 - Boil the chicken
Take the reserved chicken and pan drippings, which include the melted butter and chicken fat, and put it all into a large stock pot. Fill with water about 3/4 of the way. Now add the vegetables - celery, carrot, and onion pieces. Note that these are not the vegetables that you will be eating as part of your soup - they are simply to add flavor to the broth as it cooks, so you can just include a couple of large chunks of each. This is a great place to use leftover celery tops, carrot ends, etc. Throw in a little salt and pepper and bring the pot to a boil. Once it is boiling, turn it down very low and simmer for a long time - even overnight.
Step 3 - Make the soup
Once the stock has simmered for a long time, turn the stove off and let it cool. Once cooled, use a strainer to strain all the broth into a large bowl or another pot. If you used chicken pieces, strip all the meat off the bones (I admit this is my LEAST favorite part about making chicken soup!) and set it aside. Throw away the bones and mushy vegetable tops, rinse out your pot, and pour your broth back into it. Add in the chicken pieces. Cut up carrots, celery, onion, potatoes, and/or any other vegetables you may desire into bite sized pieces and throw them in the pot too. If you are pressed for time you can just pour in a bag of frozen mixed vegetables. Season with more salt and pepper to taste. Cook on medium-low until vegetables are tender - only about an hour or so, since the meat and broth are already cooked.
*For chicken noodle soup, omit potatoes and wait until the vegetables are almost done, then throw in a package of noodles and cook until they are soft. If you are using gluten free noodles, be careful not to overcook, as they can get mushy very fast.
** If you want to make this soup ahead of time and freeze it, don't add either potatoes or noodles - they do not freeze well. Add the other vegetables and cook, then cool and pour into gallon ziploc bags and freeze. When you're ready it eat it, pull it out of the freezer, dump into the pot, add the potatoes or noodles, and cook until done.
Step 3 - Make the soup
Once the stock has simmered for a long time, turn the stove off and let it cool. Once cooled, use a strainer to strain all the broth into a large bowl or another pot. If you used chicken pieces, strip all the meat off the bones (I admit this is my LEAST favorite part about making chicken soup!) and set it aside. Throw away the bones and mushy vegetable tops, rinse out your pot, and pour your broth back into it. Add in the chicken pieces. Cut up carrots, celery, onion, potatoes, and/or any other vegetables you may desire into bite sized pieces and throw them in the pot too. If you are pressed for time you can just pour in a bag of frozen mixed vegetables. Season with more salt and pepper to taste. Cook on medium-low until vegetables are tender - only about an hour or so, since the meat and broth are already cooked.
*For chicken noodle soup, omit potatoes and wait until the vegetables are almost done, then throw in a package of noodles and cook until they are soft. If you are using gluten free noodles, be careful not to overcook, as they can get mushy very fast.
** If you want to make this soup ahead of time and freeze it, don't add either potatoes or noodles - they do not freeze well. Add the other vegetables and cook, then cool and pour into gallon ziploc bags and freeze. When you're ready it eat it, pull it out of the freezer, dump into the pot, add the potatoes or noodles, and cook until done.
Friday, April 5, 2013
Amazing Gluten Free Cheesecake
I love cheesecake. I may have a flirtatious relationship with other desserts - "oh hey, I like you, you're yummy" - but cheesecake and I are joined by the bonds of love (and possibly love-handles...oh dear...). Robert and I both love cheesecake so much that we actually had cheesecake for our wedding cake (which, thinking back, may have not been the best of plans for a July wedding...but it was still delicious!), and occasionally we would indulge and buy a cheesecake sampler from Sams club and eat it behind the children's backs.
However, the last couple of months we have been trying to eat not only gluten free, but entirely grain free, which, while it has been good for our health and waistlines, has been somewhat of hardship in that it eliminated nearly every dessert known to mankind. Unwilling to give up dessert entirely, I started exploring some grain free dessert alternatives. One dessert that stuck out as an obvious choice was cheesecake, since it's only grains are contained within the crust. I developed a new crust out of almond meal, which is basically just whole almonds ground very finely until they are almost flour-like, and tried it with my cheesecake, and oh my! Heavenly! I don't miss old cheesecake crust at all...in fact, I think I prefer it this way!
Unfortunately this recipe isn't COMPLETELY grain free, because the cheesecake batter itself calls for 2 tablespoons of gluten free flour, and I haven't yet figured out a good substitute that will bind it together. But spread through the whole cheesecake, that seems a fairly negligible amount. If I ever get around to doing some research, perhaps I can find a substitute that will render the recipe truly grain free, and then I will share it with y'all.
Cheesecake it not hard at all to make, but it does take a long time from start to finish, mostly waiting for things to warm or cool. If you are having company and want to serve cheesecake for dessert, I'd advise making it a day in advance (and hiding it deep in the recesses of your fridge so your kids don't get into it)!
Amazing Gluten Free Cheesecake
**First, leave cream cheese, sour cream, and eggs on counter to come to room temperature, about 1 hour. The softer the cream cheese is, the smoother the cheesecake will be. If it's too cold, your cheesecake will still taste good but it'll be lumpy or grainy.
Crust:
1 cup ground almond meal*
1/4 raw cane sugar
2 T melted butter
Mix the almond meal and the sugar together. (The 1/4 makes for a fairly sweet crust, so if you want it just a little sweet, reduce sugar to about 2 T). Add melted butter and stir until sticking together and crumbly. Press (I think clean fingers work best) into the bottom of a 9 inch springform cheesecake pan, making sure the whole bottom is covered. The 1 cup of almond meal makes enough to cover just the bottom, so if you want the crust to come up the sides, too, I'd recommend doubling the crust recipe.
Bake crust at 350 F for about 10 minutes, until lightly browned. Depending on your oven, you may want to turn once halfway through to have it brown evenly. Cool crust for about 10 minutes. Increase oven temp to 375.
Filling:
2 packages cream cheese, softened
2 cups (1 16 oz carton) sour cream, room temp
1 c sugar (again, can use less for a mildly sweet cake)
2 T gluten free flour blend (I use Pamela's gluten free bread mix)
1 t vanilla
1/2 t almond extract**
3 egss, room temp
1 t finely grated lemon peel
Mix together cream cheese, sour cream, sugar, gluten free flour, vanilla, and almond extract until well combined. Add eggs and lemon peel and beat until smooth.
Pour filling into pan on top of cooled crust. Put on the second to lowest rack of your oven. Underneath, on the lowest rack, Bake at 375 for 45 minutes or until the top is lightly browned, the edges feel firm and springy when lightly touched, and a knife or toothpick comes out clean from the center. Cool on the counter for about 2 hours before attempting to open the spring on the pan. Chill in the refridgerator another 4 hours, at least.
*You can buy almond meal at Vitamin Cottage or probably other health food stores such as Whole Foods. However, if you can't find it, you can also make your own from whole almonds. Follow this link for directions: http://glutenfreecooking.about.com/od/glutenfreeingredient1/ht/makealmondmeal.htm
**If you don't want an almond flavored cheesecake, omit this flavoring or use some other kind of flavoring such a lemon, orange, etc. Robert and I really like almond flavored things, so I use a lot of the extract, but you can also use less, about 1/4 teaspoon, for a less strong flavor. The same goes for the lemon peel; I really like the combination of almond extract and lemon, but if you don't care for lemon, you can reduce or omit the lemon peel, or substitute orange or lime peel for a really exotic cheesecake!
You can serve your cheesecake plain or with whipped cream and strawberries...or cherries...or raspberries...the possibilities are endless. Honestly, the hardest part of this recipe is waiting until the silly thing is cool enough to slice.
As you can see, I couldn't even wait long enough to take a picture first... ;-)
However, the last couple of months we have been trying to eat not only gluten free, but entirely grain free, which, while it has been good for our health and waistlines, has been somewhat of hardship in that it eliminated nearly every dessert known to mankind. Unwilling to give up dessert entirely, I started exploring some grain free dessert alternatives. One dessert that stuck out as an obvious choice was cheesecake, since it's only grains are contained within the crust. I developed a new crust out of almond meal, which is basically just whole almonds ground very finely until they are almost flour-like, and tried it with my cheesecake, and oh my! Heavenly! I don't miss old cheesecake crust at all...in fact, I think I prefer it this way!
Unfortunately this recipe isn't COMPLETELY grain free, because the cheesecake batter itself calls for 2 tablespoons of gluten free flour, and I haven't yet figured out a good substitute that will bind it together. But spread through the whole cheesecake, that seems a fairly negligible amount. If I ever get around to doing some research, perhaps I can find a substitute that will render the recipe truly grain free, and then I will share it with y'all.
Cheesecake it not hard at all to make, but it does take a long time from start to finish, mostly waiting for things to warm or cool. If you are having company and want to serve cheesecake for dessert, I'd advise making it a day in advance (and hiding it deep in the recesses of your fridge so your kids don't get into it)!
Amazing Gluten Free Cheesecake
**First, leave cream cheese, sour cream, and eggs on counter to come to room temperature, about 1 hour. The softer the cream cheese is, the smoother the cheesecake will be. If it's too cold, your cheesecake will still taste good but it'll be lumpy or grainy.
Crust:
1 cup ground almond meal*
1/4 raw cane sugar
2 T melted butter
Mix the almond meal and the sugar together. (The 1/4 makes for a fairly sweet crust, so if you want it just a little sweet, reduce sugar to about 2 T). Add melted butter and stir until sticking together and crumbly. Press (I think clean fingers work best) into the bottom of a 9 inch springform cheesecake pan, making sure the whole bottom is covered. The 1 cup of almond meal makes enough to cover just the bottom, so if you want the crust to come up the sides, too, I'd recommend doubling the crust recipe.
Bake crust at 350 F for about 10 minutes, until lightly browned. Depending on your oven, you may want to turn once halfway through to have it brown evenly. Cool crust for about 10 minutes. Increase oven temp to 375.
Filling:
2 packages cream cheese, softened
2 cups (1 16 oz carton) sour cream, room temp
1 c sugar (again, can use less for a mildly sweet cake)
2 T gluten free flour blend (I use Pamela's gluten free bread mix)
1 t vanilla
1/2 t almond extract**
3 egss, room temp
1 t finely grated lemon peel
Mix together cream cheese, sour cream, sugar, gluten free flour, vanilla, and almond extract until well combined. Add eggs and lemon peel and beat until smooth.
Pour filling into pan on top of cooled crust. Put on the second to lowest rack of your oven. Underneath, on the lowest rack, Bake at 375 for 45 minutes or until the top is lightly browned, the edges feel firm and springy when lightly touched, and a knife or toothpick comes out clean from the center. Cool on the counter for about 2 hours before attempting to open the spring on the pan. Chill in the refridgerator another 4 hours, at least.
*You can buy almond meal at Vitamin Cottage or probably other health food stores such as Whole Foods. However, if you can't find it, you can also make your own from whole almonds. Follow this link for directions: http://glutenfreecooking.about.com/od/glutenfreeingredient1/ht/makealmondmeal.htm
**If you don't want an almond flavored cheesecake, omit this flavoring or use some other kind of flavoring such a lemon, orange, etc. Robert and I really like almond flavored things, so I use a lot of the extract, but you can also use less, about 1/4 teaspoon, for a less strong flavor. The same goes for the lemon peel; I really like the combination of almond extract and lemon, but if you don't care for lemon, you can reduce or omit the lemon peel, or substitute orange or lime peel for a really exotic cheesecake!
You can serve your cheesecake plain or with whipped cream and strawberries...or cherries...or raspberries...the possibilities are endless. Honestly, the hardest part of this recipe is waiting until the silly thing is cool enough to slice.
As you can see, I couldn't even wait long enough to take a picture first... ;-)
Thursday, April 4, 2013
{don't be a} Pushover
I have always been the type of person who avoids confrontation. Most oldest children are "Type A" personalities, and, while I may fit the "bossy older sister" profile in some categories, I am not a very confrontational person. When I get upset, I tend to internalize things and just "stew" over them without telling the person how I feel. And I think the older I get, the more hesitant I've become about sharing my true feelings with other people. There is a very small number of friends and family members I feel comfortable telling "what's what," but for the general population, I am a pushover. I have a terribly hard time saying no to people when they ask for favors, or telling them if their behavior is upsetting me. I like to be liked and I dislike having people angry at me. I tend to be overly apologetic, even if something wasn't my fault. But underneath the placid-seeming surface, it rankles.
I remember one time when I was a child, I was forced to apologize for something I did not do. It was my weekly piano lesson, and this week there was someplace important we had to be right after piano, so Mom impressed upon me "the moment your lesson is over, get your book and come straight out to the car - do not stop to talk to anyone or do anything else!" So, as soon as my lesson ended, I obediently grabbed my book and headed toward the door. As I was running out, the boy whose lesson followed mine was coming in the door. We were friends, so I said "Hi! And Bye!" in the same breath as I ran out the door - my attempt at being polite rather than just ignoring him. Unfortunately for me, his mom was with him, and she decided somehow to take offense at my terse greeting. She collared me, marched me out to the car where mom was waiting, and told the whole story of my supposed rudeness. (Please remember that this story is from my 8 year old point of view). I tried to explain that I just been trying to obey Mom, but in the end, my mom made me apologize to her for what she perceived as me being rude. Probably Mom made me say "I'm sorry if I offended you" or some such thing, but in my childish mind, I was being forced to apologize for obeying my mom and trying be polite. Twenty some odd years later, the memory still rankles. Pathetic, yes. Pathological inability to let things go - absolutely. Did it probably make up for all the things I got away with unpunished? Definitely. But still...the injustice of it all! Somehow the way I felt as an 8 year old, when I was forced to apologize simply because she was an adult, mirrors the same helpless feeling I have today when I am unable to tell people how upset or angry or hurt I really am.
Some unfortunate circumstances that happened to me this week have brought that feeling to the forefront. I let certain people impose on me in ways that made me uncomfortable, and later on, I became quite angry about it. But I didn't tell them how I felt, and I probably won't. Partly because we are not close enough to have that kind of honest relationship, and partly because I am just a plain old coward about confrontation. My husband is quite the opposite. He never backs down from telling people what he thinks - except maybe certain clients who would fire him if he told them just how annoying they are. And granted, this level of honesty means he sometimes offends people and sometimes puts his foot in his mouth. But nobody could ever accuse him of being a coward.
It got me wondering about which response is right. "Turn the other cheek?" "Speak the truth in love?" "Don't cast your pearls before swine?" Jesus always spoke the truth in love. But he also remained silent when he was interrogated and it served no purpose for him to argue with someone He knew wouldn't listen anyway.
I guess I need to find a way to speak honestly, loving to the people in my life. But also, to bear with them and forgive them, not holding a grudge, even if nothing changes.
What about you? Are you pushy? Or a pushover? Which personality type do you think is best?
I remember one time when I was a child, I was forced to apologize for something I did not do. It was my weekly piano lesson, and this week there was someplace important we had to be right after piano, so Mom impressed upon me "the moment your lesson is over, get your book and come straight out to the car - do not stop to talk to anyone or do anything else!" So, as soon as my lesson ended, I obediently grabbed my book and headed toward the door. As I was running out, the boy whose lesson followed mine was coming in the door. We were friends, so I said "Hi! And Bye!" in the same breath as I ran out the door - my attempt at being polite rather than just ignoring him. Unfortunately for me, his mom was with him, and she decided somehow to take offense at my terse greeting. She collared me, marched me out to the car where mom was waiting, and told the whole story of my supposed rudeness. (Please remember that this story is from my 8 year old point of view). I tried to explain that I just been trying to obey Mom, but in the end, my mom made me apologize to her for what she perceived as me being rude. Probably Mom made me say "I'm sorry if I offended you" or some such thing, but in my childish mind, I was being forced to apologize for obeying my mom and trying be polite. Twenty some odd years later, the memory still rankles. Pathetic, yes. Pathological inability to let things go - absolutely. Did it probably make up for all the things I got away with unpunished? Definitely. But still...the injustice of it all! Somehow the way I felt as an 8 year old, when I was forced to apologize simply because she was an adult, mirrors the same helpless feeling I have today when I am unable to tell people how upset or angry or hurt I really am.
Some unfortunate circumstances that happened to me this week have brought that feeling to the forefront. I let certain people impose on me in ways that made me uncomfortable, and later on, I became quite angry about it. But I didn't tell them how I felt, and I probably won't. Partly because we are not close enough to have that kind of honest relationship, and partly because I am just a plain old coward about confrontation. My husband is quite the opposite. He never backs down from telling people what he thinks - except maybe certain clients who would fire him if he told them just how annoying they are. And granted, this level of honesty means he sometimes offends people and sometimes puts his foot in his mouth. But nobody could ever accuse him of being a coward.
It got me wondering about which response is right. "Turn the other cheek?" "Speak the truth in love?" "Don't cast your pearls before swine?" Jesus always spoke the truth in love. But he also remained silent when he was interrogated and it served no purpose for him to argue with someone He knew wouldn't listen anyway.
I guess I need to find a way to speak honestly, loving to the people in my life. But also, to bear with them and forgive them, not holding a grudge, even if nothing changes.
What about you? Are you pushy? Or a pushover? Which personality type do you think is best?
Monday, March 18, 2013
What Women Fantasize About (G-rated)
Note - despite the title of this post, it doesn't contain inappropriate material. Or at least not much. ;-)
My husband asked me one day if women struggled with fantasizing about other men. I just laughed.
"Oh, honey," I said. "We fantasize about a lot of things...but men really aren't one of them."
One of the key differences between men and women that men will never understand. Men fantasize about women. Women fantasize about...having enough alone time to get done all the things we want? Maybe that sounds selfish. Maybe it is. Maybe we are selfish in our fantasies because that is the only time we can ever afford to be selfish - the rest of the time, we are too busy taking care of everyone else!
Here's a short list, by no mean comprehensive, of things women fantasize about:
-sitting on the couch, in a perfectly clean house (that someone else cleaned), sipping wine (or sparkling cider for teetotlaers like me) and watching Jane Austen and Elizabeth Gaskell movies
- eating magical chocolate that makes us thinner with each bite
- waking up in the morning looking like we just spent 3 hours getting ready, without actually having to spend the 3 hours
- going shopping by ourselves, without any kids, and coming home to happy children and dinner already cooked
- sitting in church with our husband and adorable, well-dressed, well-behaved children, who sit still and quietly through the entire service
- bras that make us look good, but feel like we're wearing pajamas, and shoes that look like stilettos, but are as comfortable as bedroom slippers
- finding our favorite brand of clothing, in our size, marked 80% off
- fitting into last year's swimsuit (jeans are applicable too)
- taking a two hour bubble bath with a good book and NO interruptions
- a world where snakes and spiders do not exist
- having a bathroom all to ourselves, so we can scatter our makeup, curling irons, and hair products with impunity and never have to worry about whether the toilet seat is up
- painless childbirth (Hahahahaha! just the thought is hysterical!)
-getting 12 hours of sleep every night
- being served tea and scones from a beautiful china teapot at four o'clock each afternoon by our personal maid just like on Downton Abbey (possibly while watching Downton Abbey...)
- sometimes, I must confess, we fantasize about our husbands getting to experience our monthly periods or, even better, labor! That way they can understand what we go through and show much more gratitude for our forbearance as each month passes without an axe-murder occurring...
- and finally, one of my favorite fantasies, which crosses my mind nearly on a daily basis (including today), looks like this:
Le Sigh. Don't we all wish...
Okay, now pull your head down out of the clouds and go scrub something and find something about your actual life to be thankful for!
Then eat some chocolate and pretend it's magical chocolate that makes you thinner. You never know...it could happen....
Now, what about you, women everywhere? Anything you want to add to my list? (G-rated comments only please!)
My husband asked me one day if women struggled with fantasizing about other men. I just laughed.
"Oh, honey," I said. "We fantasize about a lot of things...but men really aren't one of them."
One of the key differences between men and women that men will never understand. Men fantasize about women. Women fantasize about...having enough alone time to get done all the things we want? Maybe that sounds selfish. Maybe it is. Maybe we are selfish in our fantasies because that is the only time we can ever afford to be selfish - the rest of the time, we are too busy taking care of everyone else!
Here's a short list, by no mean comprehensive, of things women fantasize about:
-sitting on the couch, in a perfectly clean house (that someone else cleaned), sipping wine (or sparkling cider for teetotlaers like me) and watching Jane Austen and Elizabeth Gaskell movies
- eating magical chocolate that makes us thinner with each bite
- waking up in the morning looking like we just spent 3 hours getting ready, without actually having to spend the 3 hours
- going shopping by ourselves, without any kids, and coming home to happy children and dinner already cooked
- sitting in church with our husband and adorable, well-dressed, well-behaved children, who sit still and quietly through the entire service
- bras that make us look good, but feel like we're wearing pajamas, and shoes that look like stilettos, but are as comfortable as bedroom slippers
- finding our favorite brand of clothing, in our size, marked 80% off
- fitting into last year's swimsuit (jeans are applicable too)
- taking a two hour bubble bath with a good book and NO interruptions
- a world where snakes and spiders do not exist
- having a bathroom all to ourselves, so we can scatter our makeup, curling irons, and hair products with impunity and never have to worry about whether the toilet seat is up
- painless childbirth (Hahahahaha! just the thought is hysterical!)
-getting 12 hours of sleep every night
- being served tea and scones from a beautiful china teapot at four o'clock each afternoon by our personal maid just like on Downton Abbey (possibly while watching Downton Abbey...)
- sometimes, I must confess, we fantasize about our husbands getting to experience our monthly periods or, even better, labor! That way they can understand what we go through and show much more gratitude for our forbearance as each month passes without an axe-murder occurring...
- and finally, one of my favorite fantasies, which crosses my mind nearly on a daily basis (including today), looks like this:
Le Sigh. Don't we all wish...
Okay, now pull your head down out of the clouds and go scrub something and find something about your actual life to be thankful for!
Then eat some chocolate and pretend it's magical chocolate that makes you thinner. You never know...it could happen....
Now, what about you, women everywhere? Anything you want to add to my list? (G-rated comments only please!)
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